08/27/2007: "Gone, Gone, Gonzo"
When the scores are all settled up, say, sometime in the 22nd century, it will come as no surprise if Alberto Gonzales is written up by historians as one of the key figures in the destruction of the American constitution. There will likely be a great deal of rubble in that future time, washed by the newly risen waters of globally warmed glacial ice melts. But if historians can keep their heads above water and can stil breathe, smiling, cynical, unctuous Alberto's works will surely be recognized. As counsel to the Selected President, King George, Alberto diligently pursued the violation of the Geneva Accords by writing the legal opinions used by the war criminals occupying the White House to justify torture in the name of terrorism. (You can always tell those who are guilty of torture by their sanctimonious outrage and denials of torture.) Alberto did such a good job of convincing The Selected One that the Geneva Convention was irrelevant, that he was made Attorney General. And as the top prosecutor in the land, Alberto would continue to be a good political soldier by firing all federal prosecutors who did not toe the party line. He would make sure that only political enemies were prosecuted, and that political friends and contributors were given a free pass for their nefarious activities. And he would lead the charge to erase the words of the constitution that have to do with personal freedom and that silly, out-dated notion of habeas corpus, and do his very damnedest to justify keeping the George Weenie/Tricky Dick Cheney police state on full alert against its citizens.
On the occasion of Gonzales' resignation, George the Lesser said that Gonzales received "unfair treatment that has created harmful distraction at the Justice Department." Yes, having your crimes exposed and investigated by Congress is a bit of a distraction. Gonzales, though gone, will not be forgotten. I know it's a fantasy, but an indictment or two by a Congress suddenly finding its balls would be an even better distraction. The more likely scenario is a multi-million dollar book deal waiting in the wings so that Alberto can explain what a really patriotic American he was, and how it was just those danged political enemies of The First Half Wit that didn't like his style. (Never mind that Republicans and Democrats alike were howling for his head on a platter.)
Oh, and the rumor is that the new Attorney General could be Michael Chertoff of Homeland Security fame. Now, what could be better? I mean look what a fine job he did with Katrina relief in New Orleans.
